Help with my narrative writing! Any writers?
April 4th, 2009 | by admin |I need help with narrative writing.
Can you help me with any errors or advices?
My sentences are not so smooth and flowy.
1) The world’s first advanced adoption of nano filtration, and success in achieving a breakthrough with Coway’s acknowledgeable filter layer in water purifier system by producing the Ionized water system and disinfectants generation system by water electrolysis without any chemical, were the miracles that Coway’s constant efforts had made possible. And these contributions can be approved and recognized through our quality of air purifier.
2) Coway’s advanced, personal, and capability-adjustable filter works to minimize the hidden danger from unobservable sources by completely eliminating the viruses that can cause Human Influenza and Legionnaire’s Disease for today’s people who spend most of time indoors, and extinguishing toxic compounds that breed from birds cages, and depurating detrimental materials blown during harsh stormy weather.
Stefan
One Response to “Help with my narrative writing! Any writers?”
By pcpy on Apr 7, 2009 | Reply
The bat too many ands and commas.